One room where the whole story is allowed.
For men carrying sexual behavior that has outgrown what they intended, and the shame that keeps it in the dark. We work at the roots, and we build the skills closeness actually requires.
Competent, responsible, and quietly exhausted by the management.
Most of the men I work with are functioning well by every external measure. The difficulty is private: pornography use or other sexual behavior that keeps outgrowing the limits they set, difficulty being assertive anywhere it matters, and a growing sense of being unknown by the people closest to them.
Some are in the courting process and cannot understand why intimacy keeps stalling. Some are years into a relationship that is now in crisis. Many grew up managing a parent's feelings (mother-son enmeshment, or a narcissistic parent) and learned early that their own needs were negotiable.
You do not need a diagnosis, a rock bottom, or a tidy explanation to start. You need one hour a week and a willingness to be honest in it.
At a glance
- Fee
- $185 per session
- Format
- 50 minutes, weekly to start
- Location
- Long Beach office or telehealth across California
- Language
- English; Se habla español
Four things we do, roughly in this order.
What the behavior is doing for you
Compulsive sexual behavior is rarely about wanting sex too much. It is usually the fastest reliable way you have found to change how you feel.
Lowering the shame that keeps it running
Toxic shame says the problem is you, not the behavior. That belief makes honesty feel impossible and escape feel necessary.
Intimacy and assertiveness you can use this week
Closeness is not a personality trait. It is a set of skills: knowing your own state, saying it, tolerating someone else's response.
A personalized plan, in your words
You leave the first month with a written plan you actually agree with, not a protocol handed to you.
What changes, and roughly in what order.
No timelines and no promises about outcomes. I do not know your life yet, and anyone who quotes you a success rate is selling something. What I can describe is the shape of the work.
Early
Honesty and stabilization
We get the full picture, reduce the immediate chaos, and establish structure you had a hand in designing. Most men notice the relief of a single person knowing the whole thing before they notice any behavior change.
What a session actually looks like
Fifty minutes, conversational, structured enough to go somewhere. Open each part to see how the hour tends to run.
Asked before the first session, more often than anything else.
Frequently Asked Questions
One call, fifteen minutes, no cost
Tell me one sentence about why you are calling. I will tell you honestly whether I think I can help and what I would start with.